Tobi's Son
by Accidental Child
Summary: Tobi was just out checking the mail when he finds a baby. Will Tobi be a good father? All the Akatsuki characters will be in this. Loads of  interesting  pranks. Rated for Hidan's mouth.
1. Finding Naruto

**this story is set before Naruto. Tobi is Tobi, Not Madara or Obito. Just Tobi. characters might be a bit OOC, but that is nantural, it is my story after all!**

**Disclaimer: as much as i want to own Naruto, i can't draw for shit. (this disclaimer goes for all chapters)**

**On to the story!**

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><p>Tobi was feeling good. He had tidied the room he shared with Sasori and Deidara. He had made breakfast. He had even washed the dishes. But he had a feeling he was forgetting something…<p>

"The mail!" Tobi rushed outside just as the mail man left. Don't wonder why there was a mail man outside of the super secret Akatsuki base. There just was.

The mail box was shaped like a bird house. In fact the mail box used to be a bird house that was found lying on the ground somewhere.

Anyway… Tobi stuck his hand into the hole, and felt around. His fingers felt Bob the spider, which scurried off into the dark corner of the mail box, and a wad of letters, tied together with a bit of string.

Tobi was about to walk back into the cave, when he heard a wail.

Tobi, being the kind person that he is, went to see if the person that wailed was alright.

There was another wail, this time followed by crying.

"Hold on! I'm coming." Tobi called. He rushed towards the source of the sound and found…

… a baby.

The first thing that came into Tobi's mind was, 'poor baby'. The second was 'how did a cute widdle baby find his way here'.

The baby gave another wail, and Tobi picked it up, and started rocking the baby in his arms. The baby stoped crying, and opened his eyes.

The baby's eyes were a glorious sky blue. He already had short, soft, spiky hair. On each of his cheeks, were three clear lines, giving the baby a slightly feral look. The baby was wrapped up in white, blood stained blanket

But the baby was still cute.

Tobi put the baby under his arm, and a small folded piece of paper fell out of the blanket. Tobi reached down, and opened it.

Written in red ink, or blood, was one word.

'Naruto'

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><p>"Leader-sama! Leader-sama! look what I found!"<p>

"Tobi, it's a baby." Leader knew where this was going.

"Can I keep him? Pwease?" Tobi, knowing that Leader-sama would never agree, utilised the dreaded puppy-dog eyes (or eye in this case).

Leader made the mistake of looking, and found himself in capable of disagreeing. "Fine."

Tobi cheered, and ran off down the corridore, unable to restrain himself.

"Good lord, what have I done?" Leader sighed. Tobi's cheers rang through the base.

"I'm gonna show everyone!" Came Tobi's voice. Leader sighed again.

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><p><strong>Please review! i want to recieve plot ideas. if you want something put in the story, i will try. just send in the reviews.<strong>


	2. Meetings and Bad Business

**Hi Guys! Sorry it took so long. I got writers block. I lost inspiration. And I was lazy. Special thanks to my dear friend COU0003, who helped a lot with this chapter. Go read her fics!**

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><p>"Deidara-senpaiiii!" Tobi sang, raising the little baby over his head. Deidara sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.<p>

"What is it?" Deidara asked. Tobi annoys him. He can't leave the artist alone. "Guess what I found!"

Deidara shrugged. "A brain?"

"No, senpai, a baby!"

"Should I care?" Deidara replied in a bored tone.

"But it's a kawaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii baby!"

"Can I blow it up?"

"NO!"

"Then I don't care." And with that, the male blonde walked away, wondering what village he would blow up next.

_*SPACE*_

"Hidan-saaaaaaan!"

Hidan, was on the ground in the middle of one of his rituals. "WHAT IS IT YOU UNRELIGIOUS FUCKER? CANT YOU SEE THAT I'M BUSY HERE?"

Tobi eeped, ducked the spike thrown at him, and ran away, holding Naruto protectively to his chest.

_*SPACE*_

"Hey Konan!" Tobi yelled, running towards the blue-haired member. Konan stopped making origami and looked up.

"What is it?" she asked. She was currently making an origami of the nine-tails.

"I found a baby!" Tobi chanted, holding out baby Naruto. Konan smiled sweetly at Naruto. "Awwwww! He's so kawaii!"

Konan held Naruto against her breasts. Tobi wished that he was in Naruto's body.

Suddenly, Naruto grabbed the Kyuubi origami and ate it.

Konan stopped smiling. "…OH MY GOD! I POISONED HIM! I POISONED MY BABY! NOOOOOOOO!"

Tobi lifted up his finger. "It's my baby!"

Konan and Tobi started crying. Naruto was in the background, merely eating all the origami one by one.

_*SPACE*_

Once the two had stopped crying, and Tobi had escaped with Naruto, Naruto decided that it was his turn to cry. He had a right to cry dammit, and cry he would.

Tobi was stumped. How do you deal with this? He smelt Naruto. It appeared that Naruto had had an accident.

Tobi ran towards the nearest bathroom. He opened the door, shoved Orochimaru out, and got to business.

Smelly, horrible, business.

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><p><strong>AN<strong>

**By the way, I have no idea when the next chapter comes out, so in the meantime, go look at my other story(s).**

**REVIEW PLEASE!**


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